Up In Smoke
by Darkryt Orbinautz
Summary: Smokescreen gets an assignment to Downtown City to investigate a string of disappearances. The Cutie Mark Crusaders tag along, and fun times are had by all! Well, except the Biskits.


**Disclaimer: Transformers, My Little Pony and Littlest Pet Shop are the properties of Hasbro.**

**The Cybermen are the properties of The BBC broadcasting network.**

**This is a non-profit work made by an independent contractor outside of any company's official notice intended for _non-profit _entertainment and speculative purposes only.**

**Darkryt Orbinautz presents...**

* * *

Earth had a wide variety of places to live. Whether it was a smoky factory industrial area, a quiet little burg on the edge of nowhere, OR a _hellish frozen wasteland! _

Downtown City was something of a cross between the first two, having sky-reaching skyscrapers that didn't quite touch the heavens. Smoke-blowing factories that weren't so horrible pollution that the air wasn't breathable. Plants could be grown, but they weren't as nice as they could have been.

The cars were also plentiful, though not nearly as obnoxious as they would be as, say...New York. (When it wasn't being totally overrun by Decepticon armies, that is.)

As it was past evening, the traffic was actually quite quiet. The only cars out were the ones of some pour souls who had car trouble or had to work late.

Cruising down the street, the math teacher of the local school was stopped by a stoplight. He didn't mind much. He wasn't in a hurry.

But up ahead, he could vaguely make out an odd series of blue lights. It almost seemed like they were approaching him.

"That's weird." The teacher mumbled to himself. He stuck his head out the window and honked for their attention. "Hey, kids! You really shouldn't be out this late at night with your face glowsticks!"

Before he knew it, those lights were right besides his car, and the inhuman appearance of what they belonged provoked him into screaming.

"_Do-not-fear._" The mechanical monstrosity buzzed at him as more of its kind surrounded the car.

"_We-will-remove-your-fear._"

* * *

_Da-daaun-datta-dat-daun-dun_

_You think about all the things you love to do._

_It all comes true._

_You find a place where you never knew,_

_Where you're happy to_

_Just be you!_

_We can be (Yeah!)_

_Who we wanna be (Yeah!)_

_At the Littlest Pet Shop,_

_You and Meeee!_

* * *

**Friendship Is Magic: Prime Bonus Story**

**Up In Smoke**

**Episode Synoposis**

**Smokescreen is assigned to investigate disappearances at Downtown City. Seems simple, but then the Cutie Mark Crusaders tag along...**

* * *

Smokescreen was parked inside the Apple Family barn, since the Apple Family didn't really have a garage _per se_ to put him in. He liked the barn- it was just spacious enough for him to transform and walk around in. But he still felt like he was being treated like an animal. A pet. Apple Bloom's pet Autobot. _That_, he did not like so much.

Applejack peeked her head in through the barn door. "Hey, Smokescreen! Big Macintosh and Ah are 'bout to start today's applebucking. Y'all wanna lend a hoof?"

"Sounds like fun!" Smokescreen exclaimed. "...But how do I help?"

"It's easy. Just hit the trees until the apples fall off into the baskets."

"Oh...okay!"

Smokescreen drove out the barn and converted to robot mode. Walking with Applejack to the orchard, he saw Big Macintosh working.

"Jus' watch Big Macintosh 'ere, and ya should git the hang of it." Applejack encouraged him. Smokescreen followed her instructions, glaring so intently Apple Bloom though he was trying to set Big Macintosh on fire with his eyes.

Big Macintosh sat down on his haunches near a tree, observing it. After he had decided how best to approach it, he got up and turned his back to it before swinging out his powerful hind legs and giving the tree a solid blow. The apples on the branches dropped out into the baskets like they were conceding to defeat to Mac's superior strength.

"That doesn't seem too hard..." Smokescreen muttered. "Yeah...yeah, I can do that!" The young Autobot turned his fist towards a tree nopony had got to yet and walked towards. He paused, not knowing how to get the apples out. His body wasn't built for bucking, that was for sure. He scratched his chin, then snapped his fingers when he realized what to do. Aiming his fist, he gave the tree a hard punch that made the apples wobble.

"Oooh..." Smokescreen sighed and hung his shoulders at his apparent failure.

"Cheer up, Smokescreen!" Apple Bloom cheered at him. "Not everypony gets it on their first try!"

The apples wobbled a little longer, before finally falling off.

"Ha! YES!" Smokescreen threw his fists in the air in triumph. The Apple siblings whooped and reared up in applause. They all proceeded to have a good time together bucking (or punching, in Smokescreen's case) apples, until Ultra Magnus stepped into the orchard.

"Oh. Howdy, Ultra Magnus! What brings you to our humble little farm?" Applejack greeted him.

Ultra Magnus held his hand out. "Ah-ah-ah! From now on, all Ponies shall refer to me as "Your Magnushood."

Applejack was dubious. "Wuh...Really?"

"Yes!" Ultra Magnus answered proudly, beating a hand on his dark blue chest.

Smokescreen bent over and whispered to Applejack. "Ultra Magnus has a reputation for being a prankster. Your best bet right now would probably be to just play along."

Applejack sighed. She had enough 'playing along' to last a lifetime with Rarity's ridiculous ideas... actually, that was oddly fitting, as Rarity drifted towards the Wreckers whenever she wants to hang out with the Autobots, and Ultra Magnus was the Wreckers' commander...

"Anyways..." Applejack hesitated. "_Your Magnushood_, wut do y'all need?"

Ultra Magnus held out his arm, panels on which swung open on their hinges. "I've gotten a message from my brother about a news report of disappearing persons in a city on Earth. Since Smokescreen doesn't have a huge service record, and we don't have any indication- _yet_- that this is anything dangerous, he's decided to sent him on it."

"But I'm officially assigned to Equestria..." Smokescreen muttered.

"I'm officially _assigned_ to Cybertron, yet, here I am." Ultra Magnus retorted, with a tone to suggest that 'assigned' was a word that meant very little to him.

"All right." Smokesceen conceded. "Let's go, Ultra Magnus!"

Magnus grunted.

Smokescreen sighed. "Your Magnushood."

Magnus smiled. "That's better."

The two Autobots began to walk off the orchard.

"Well, Ah hope he does well on his new assignment." Applejack wished him well before turning back to her farm, only to see Apple Bloom had disappeared. "Hey, where's Apple Bloom?"

* * *

"Mah pet's goin' to Earth wit'out me!" Apple Bloom complained to her fellow Crusaders.

"I'm sure he'll be fine." Scootaloo said. "Didn't you tell us, he, like, used Optimus' hammer to smash a Decepticon lich or something?"

"It was Ultra Magnus' hammer." Apple Bloom corrected. "And yeah, he did...but Ah should git ta go wit' mah Autobot!"

The three fillies lied there, pondering what to do.

"You know..." Scootaloo started with a mischievous grin. "We've never been to Earth ourselves." She wiggled her eyebrows at the two of them.

"Rarity said she'd like to take me to Earth and go with Miko to this place called "Tokyo"." Sweetie Belle added. "But she says she has nightmares about this Decepticon called Hardshell...uh, what was it she said?... Returning from the grave and eely-eel-l- 'electromagnetically pulling his wrecked body together and breaking my horn like he did her own.'" Sweetie Belle huffed, having said that last sentence in one breath.

"Yeah...yeah!" Apple Bloom realized. The three fillies clapped hooves.

"CUTIE MARK CRUSADER EARTH VISITORS, YAY!"

* * *

At Team Prime's Outpost, Twilight, Pinkie and Rainbow Dash were hanging out with the Ratchet, Arcee, Raf and Bumblebee.

Pinkie's tail twitched. "Oh, hey Ratchet! Look out!"

Ratchet pulled away from his computers and looked around. A piece of plaster fell from the ceiling and shattered against his head.

"OW! What in the AllSpark...?" Ratchet swore, rubbing his sore cranial module.

"Pinkie Sense, dude." Rainbow explained.

"Pinkie Sense?"

"Yes." Twilight answered. "Pinkie has a limited ability to tell the future using her Pinkie Sense."

Ratchet scoffed. "I don't believe that."

"I didn't, either."

"Perhaps we can run some tests..." Ratchet growled.

Twilight's eyes widened, remembering her own ill-fated and disastrous attempts to study Pinkie's Pinkie Sense. "Trust me, Ratchet, you don't want to do that. I tried. It didn't end well."

Ratchet crossed his arms and drew his chest in sharply. "What do you try, exactly?"

"What do you mean?"

"Monitoring her brain patterns?"

"Tried it."

"Studying her behavior?"

"Tried it."

Ratchet paused and rubbed his chin. "Testing if there's a specific trigger for her Pinkie Sense from the surrounding area?"

"Tried it."

"...Dissection?"

Twilight's jaw dropped in horror. "AAHHH! OPTIMUS!"

Optimus peeked his head around the corner. "I thought I heard somepony scream my name?"

"YES!" Twilight pointed at Ratchet. "Ratchet's trying to dissect Pinkie!"

Optimus looked at Ratchet incredulously.

Ratchet stammered. "I-it-ah-...that is not true!" He stomped his foot and crossed his arms. "I was only _suggesting _it!"

Optimus' incredulously look did not change any.

Ratchet pursed his lips until he saw something appear on the terminal. He leaped at the chance to change topics. "Someone's coming through the GroundBridge."

The GroundBridge terminal opened, and Ultra Magnus and Smokescreen entered.

"Hey, bro." Ultra Magnus waved at Optimus. "Here's your rookie." Magnus smacked Smokescreen on the back. It was good-natured, but Magnus' prodigal strength sent Smokescreen flying.

Smokescreen stumbled, then attempted to right himself to salute Prime. "Smokescreen, reporting for duty!"

"I was wondering when you'd arrive." Optimus said stoically. "Has Ultra Magnus briefed you of the situation?"

"Yeah. Disappearances. Investigate. No problem." Smokescreen punched the air to show he was ready for action.

"Ratchet, prepare the GroundBridge for the coordinates I gave you this morning." Optimus instructed. Ratchet pushed some buttons and pulled the lever, resetting the GroundBridge. Smokescreen waved at Arcee and Ratchet before dashing through the GroundBridge.

Ultra Magnus looked around the room to make sure nopony was paying attention to him, then tip-toed over the GroundBridge and kicked himself in the leg. A compartment opened up, and the Cutie Mark Crusaders wobbled out from the secret panel, having experienced the common problem with the GroundBridge in that it always made organics feel sick their first time through. Despite this, the three managed to gallop through the GroundBridge's terminal after Smokescreen, and the portal closed just after they made it inside.

"That's strange." Ratchet mused. "There are three unidentified organics stepping through the GroundBridge with Smokscreen..."

Both Ratchet and Optimus instantly turned their attention to Ultra Mangus. Ultra Magnus faked offense that they would point fingers at him first.

"Wha- just so there's unknown entities in the GroundBridge, I'm automatically your first suspect?"

"Well, ordinarily, we'd look at Pinkie Pie first." Ratchet grumbled. "But you're here."

"You sayin' I'm more of a prankster then Pinkie Pie?"

"Not _more of_..." Ratchet corrected. "Just _worse_."

* * *

Blythe Baxter, super-star!

Or at least, that's what 16-year old, blue-eye, brunette Bltyhe Baxter thought in her head. She was a fashion designer by trade, and recently, she moved to Downtown City and got a job using her fashion designs to spruce up the pets.

She was sketching her sketchpad when she heard a bizarre alien hum from outside her apartment building. Tossing her writing utensil against her bed, she bounded over to the window and saw the strangest thing she'd ever seen- and she had seen her dad dancing, so that was saying something. A huge green circle mounted vertically in the air. Out of it stepped a huge silver robot with car door wings and tires in its legs.

"What the huh!?" Blythe exclaimed at the sight of it.

The huge robot looked back forth between her apartment and the building opposite hers. It transformed into a car of foreign model she'd never seen before that practically floated on the road and drove off.

Blythe blinked twice. When she had regained her bearings, she whipped out her cell phone and dialed her friend, Young Mee. "Young Mee, you are not going to believe what I just saw!"

"_You're not going to believe what I'm _seeing_!" _Young Mee told her.

"So, did you see a giant robot step out of a portal, too?"

"_Giant robot? No! I'm looking..at...a...unicorn..._toddler_!_"

"What!?"

* * *

Young Mee, an Oriental girl with those weird Oriental stick hair decs, was whispering into her phone, cowering behind the counter of her grandmother's shop where she worked, not at all eager to go out and greet the trio of talking ponies on that entered the shop. She could hear them talking.

"Vanilla!"

"Chocolate!"

"Strawberry!"

"Vanilla!"

Chocolate!"

"Strawberry!"

Young Mee made a stupefied expression. It sounded like the ponies were arguing about which flavor of ice cream to buy, but ponies didn't buy ice cream!

...Did they?

Young Mee's pet rabbit, Buttercream, hopped out from her hiding place and into Young Mee's arms. Buttercream was a cream yellow with discolorations through her fur like candy had stuck to it. "Oh, Buttercream! I'm so glad you're here. There are_ talking ponies _at the counter!"

Young Mee hugged Buttercream tightly, but the curious rabbit became interested in these talking ponies. She wriggled and pushed her way out of Young Mee's arms and hopped over the counter onto the top of one pony's head.

"Ow! Hey!" Scootaloo objected to her head suddenly being turned into a roost.

"Oooh!" Sweetie Belle squealed. She reached out a hoof and pet Buttercream. "You're a very pretty bunny!"

Buttercream giggled. "Thanks! I think you're a pretty-bo-sweetie unicorn, too!"

The Cutie Mark Crusaders stared. "Did that bunny just...talk?"

Young Mee perked up. She didn't hear Buttercream say anything except for chittering. Nervously, but more curious than afraid, she peeked her head over the counter.

Buttercream chittered again.

"Eeyup, she talked." Apple Bloom drawled.

"Awesome!" Scootaloo exclaimed. With how Fluttershy could talk to animals, it was pretty cool to have an animal talk to them!

Young Mee was starting to have an idea. Since ponies were animals, and Buttercream was an animal... "Um, excuse me?"

The three ponies turned to her, unnerving Young Mee slightly with their big eyes. But she pressed on.

"Who are you three?"

"Oh! Ah'm Apple Bloom, this is Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle. And we're..."

Young Mee was woefully unprepared for what was about to happen.

"THE CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS!"

The force of their combined shout threw Young Mee onto her butt and made Buttercream jump into the air.

"How nice." Young Mee muttered, not sure what to think. "If you don't mind me asking...how can you all talk?"

"Talk? Of course we can talk. I mean, why wouldn't we be able to talk?" Scootaloo questioned.

"Oh! I know this one!" Sweetie Belle raised her hoof. "Rarity explained to me. See, on Earth, there are ponies and horses who are kind of like us, but they don't talk or have Cutie Marks."

"On Earth?" Young Mee repeated. "Are you saying you're..aliens!?"

"Yes." The Crusaders answered with completely straight faces.

Young Mee blinked. "O...kay."

"We're here investigating a string of _mysterious disappearances_." Apple Bloom told her ominously.

"Which we'll start by ordering a triple order of chocolate ice cream." Scootaloo added.

"Strawberry!" Sweetie Belle growled.

"Vanilla!" Apple Bloom snarled.

"Girls, girls!...Fillies?" Young Mee exclaimed, trying to calm them down. "Why not just a vanilla-chocolate-strawberry swirl?"

The Crusaders stared like they had never heard of such a thing. "Do you have that?"

"Yes."

"We'll take it!"

"Okay..." Young Mee set to work preparing the swirl of ice cream, and dialed Blythe's number.

* * *

Roger Baxter, Blythe's father, was out grocery shopping and just on his way out of the store when he noticed a silver/black car that seemed to be driving around aimlessly in the parking lot. When he looked closer, he could see it didn't have a driver!...Yet, it was going entirely straight.

He put his bags down and waved the car over. "Excuse me! Sir?"

Much to his surprise, as he didn't think the car would actually response, it drove over and parked just in front of him. "Yeah?"

"I couldn't help but notice that you don't have a driver." Roger informed him, not entirely sure this was really happening.

"Nope!"

"You don't?"

"Yeah. What, you've never seen an Autobot before?"

"Well...no."

"Whaaat? Oh, well, in that case..."

Smokescreen, ever the show-off, couldn't resist the temptation to transform and pose.

Roger's jaw dropped. His first instinct was to pull out his cell phone and call his little girl. "Blythie, you are never going to believe this!"

* * *

Blythe was resting with her elbows on the windowsill, not sure what to do about there being a unicorn in her friend's shop. As she was thinking of what to do, her phone rang. She answered it. "Yello?"

"Blyth, you'll never guess what I'm seeing right now!" Her father exclaimed from the other line.

"Let me guess." Blythe exasperatedly said. "A unicorn?"

"_No! This giant robot who turns into a car!_"

_I was close_, Blythe thought to herself.

Her phone buzzed again. "Oh! Sounds awesome, dad, but Young Mee's on the other line. TTYL."

"_All right. Love ya, Blythie._"

Blythe removed the phone from her ear before her dad could make embarrassing kissy noises and clicked a button. "Talk to me, Young Mee."

"_Okay, okay._" Young Mee breathed from the other end. "_Get this. That unicorn, and her friends, are_ aliens! _And they can talk to pets, they bought ice cream from me, and they paid with these gold coins they call 'bits'!_"

"Wait." Blythe raised her hand. "Go back. What was that?"

"_They bought ice cream from me?_"

"Before that."

"_They can talk to pets?_"

"Yeah, that one." Blythe nodded. "I...gotta go, Young Mee." Blythe hung up and rubbed her chin. "Hmm..."

No one knew it, but Blythe had the ability to talk to all the pets in Downtown City. She used this ability to make sure people were complying with the pets' desires, though sometimes it could lead to trouble with her circle of furry friends who were frequently dropped into the day camp of the Littlest Pet Shop just beneath her apartment.

"So, let's review." Blythe said to herself. "There's a giant robot running around who's making friends with my dad, there are alien unicorns in Young Mee's shop who like ice cream and talk to pets. So, keeping all that in mind, what should I do?"

It stood to reason that, if the unicorns were aliens, so was the giant robot, but that was a secondary concern. If he was making friends with his dad, he couldn't have been all bad. Blythe decided instead to go to the Pet Shop and pick up one of her friends, then take them to the Sweet Shop to talk to the unicorns.

* * *

Young Mee rested her elbows on the counter, mystified at the sight of three ponies helping themselves to the ice cream she had prepared for them so enthusiastically.

The door's bell rang as Blythe entered the room with a lavender dog and an orange/brown ball of spikes in her arms.

"Blythe!" Young Mee exclaimed.

"Hey!" Blythe waved. She walked over the Crusaders' table. "So...you're the ponies Young Mee was talking about?"

Apple Bloom swallowed a spoonful of her ice cream before answered. "Eeeyup!"

Blythe blinked. "And you can...talk to pets?"

"Apparently." Scootaloo shrugged.

"Okay...talk to these two." Blythe put the dog and the ball of spikes on the table. The ball unfurled, revealing itself to be a hedgehog.

Apple Bloom chuckled. "Hey, this dog kinda looks like Twilight!"

"I beg your pardon!?" The dog snapped at them. "I'll have you know I am one-hundred-percent unique individual!"

All Young Mee heard was yipping, but Blythe and the Crusaders understood it perfectly.

"Yeesh, okay! Calm down, girl." Scootaloo scoffed. "Some ponies, huh?" She said, turning to Sweetie Belle, who nodded.

The hedgehog chuckled nervously. "Sorry about that. (She offends easily.) I'm Russell. This is Zoe. So you're...aliens?"

The Crusaders all nodded in satisfied manners, like they were proud of this.

"So..." Russell twiddled his paws. "What are you doing here?"

Before Scootaloo could answer, Young Mee's Aunt Christie stepped into the room.

"What the!? Young Mee, what is that?"

"They're talking alien unicorns who wanted to buy some ice cream." Young Mee answered.

Christie looked to her niece, then to the ponies, then back to her niece with a disbelieving expression. She shrugged. "Okay then. If that's what you young people like doing these days, then who I am to judge?" She retreated back into the management room.

"So, uh, Crusaders..." Russell chuckled nervously. "What are you doing here?"

"We're investigating mysterious disappearances."

"By eating ice cream?"

"Yes." The Crusaders answered in unison.

"Since you're aliens, shouldn't you be in some sort of...I don't know. " Russell scratched his head. "Government laboratory?"

"Nah. We're cool."

"Our big sisters DID help save the world, after all."

Zoe shook her head. "Russell, can you believe this? We're actually talking to real, live, aliens!"

"Yes...we are." Russell looked at the Crusaders. Scootaloo scooped herself the last spoonful of the ice cream and ate it.

"Welp, Ah'm bored." Apple Bloom tilted her head into her hooves.

"Maybe we could got outside?" Scootaloo suggested.

Blythe was incredulous. "You-you can't go outside! Do you know what kind of panic you'll cause if people see you!?"

The Crusaders were confused. "But...our sisters git to walk 'round Jasper all the time wit'out any problems."

"Jasper!? What does he have to do with anything!?"

"No, no. It's a place." Scootaloo corrected Blythe.

"Bored." Sweetie Belle repeated.

Before Blythe or Russell could do anything to stop, the Crusaders zipped out the door.

"We should probably stop them before someone gets hurt." Russell suggested.

Blythe nodded. She picked up both Zoe and Russell and headed out after the fillies, while Young Mee just had to deal with all the weird stuff she just witnessed.

Dashing out the door, Blythe looked both sides of the street for signs of the fillies.

"Oh no."

She saw them, sitting on the sidewalk, staring in awe at...the Largest Ever Pet Shop, run by Blythe's archenemies, the Biskit twins. They'd never let her walk freely in their store, no matter what she said, and to top it off, they had their own security robot!

The fillies bumped hooves before rushing inside.

Blythe sighed before going after them, Zoe and Russell swinging from her sides. "Wait! Girls! Stop! Don't go in there!"

Entering the building, the Crusaders were just as in awe of it's inside as they were of it's outside. "Ooooooh..."

"It's so..." Scootaloo muttered, awestruck. "Big!"

"Yah...Ah'm sure if we look a'round hard enough, we'll find sumthun to help wit' our Cutie Marks!"

"Yeah!"

They waited for Sweetie Belle to respond.

"...Hmm? Oh! Are we sure that's a good idea? It looks you could easily get lost in here..."

"What are you, chicken?"

Sweetie Belle, as typical of ponies her age, instantly took offense. "I am not a chicken!"

"Prove it!"

"Fine! I will! Let's go!"

They gave another of their earth-shattering shouts.

"CUTIE MARK CRUSADER CUTIE MARK HUNTERS, YAY!"

They then split up, running down different aisles of the Largest Ever Pet Shop. Sweetie Belle ran down the food aisle, passing by a couple who had been shopping who gave her an startled glare. Sweetie Belle, not getting it, smiled and waved at them.

Scootaloo found the toy section. She went over and sniffed one of the toy dog bones, intrigued by its smell. Sticking her tongue out, seduced by the aroma, she bit the bone and started to chew it on it, playing with it in the intended manner... at least for dogs, not ponies.

Apple Bloom went onto the far left of the store, where she was too amazed by the sheer size of the shop she didn't see a pair of humans until she had already bumped into their legs. There were twins, dressed in skirts, one with white hair, the other with dark, but both with striking red eyes,

"OMG, Britney. What is, like, that?" The black-haired haired-one questioned, pointing at Apple Bloom.

"I think, it's, like, one of those tiny horses." The white-haired one answered. "What do they call them? Like, ponies?"

"Ah'm Apple Bloom! Sorry fer bumpin' into y'all."

Both twins shrieked, and the black-haired one jumped into the arms of the white-haired one bridal style.

"OMG, Britney, did that pony, just, like, talk?"

"I think it, like, did!"

"Of course Ah talked. Why is that so gosh-durn surprisin' to everypony 'round 'ere?" Apple Bloom raised an eyebrow.

Blythe burst into the Largest Ever Pet Shop, doing a double-take to make she hadn't caught the attention of the security robot, Monban, already.

Zoe sniffed the air. "I think one of them is this way." Trusting Zoe's nose, Blythe followed her to the far left aisle, and was irked to see Apple Bloom talking with the Biskits twins. Blythe took in a deep breath and called them.

"Whitney! Britney!"

Whitney scoffed. "What is Blythe, like, doing here?"

"Maybe this pony is, like, hers. She's, like, always talking to her pets." Britney reasoned.

"Listen, I know you're probably not happy to see me, but I need to make sure this pony doesn't hurt herself." Blythe explained before noticing Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle were absent. "Hey, where are your friends, Apple Bloom?"

"Other parts of the store. They're looking for ways for us to git our Cutie Marks!"

Blythe blinked. "I'll ask what that is later. Right now, we need to get out of here before the Biskits decide to-"

"MONBAN!"

"Too late." Russell quipped.

The robot known as Monban wheeled its way towards Blythe and proceeded to pick her, Zoe, and Russell up and throw them out the store. Sweetie Belle noticed, but then she got distracted by a ball of yarn before doing anything about it.

"Ya know, Ah got a pet robot too..." Apple Bloom muttered at the sight of him. "...Mine's better."

"You have been banned from Largest Ever Pet Shop..._again_. Please see us when your banned has been lifted." Monban droned at them before retreating back into the store, stopping on his way back to give Sweetie Belle an awfully ominous look.

"Ooh... I hope those Crusader fillies will be all right." Russell put his paws together.

"With the Biskits? Probably not." Blythe dryly remarked. The three of them heard tromping metal footsteps behind them, and turned around to be startled by the sight of Smokescreen, Roger standing on the Autobot's shoulder.

"Blythe! I'm sorry for sneaking up on you like this, but I just couldn't wait to introduce you to Smokescreen here." Roger gestured towards the Autobot's head. Smokescreen picked Roger up off his shoulder and gently put the pilot on the ground.

"Hi..." Blythe nervously waved her fingers. "I'm...Blythe."

"Elite Guard Smokescreen, at your service!" Smokescreen pointed to his winged Autobot insignia.

"Smokescreen say's he here from another planet and is investigating a string of disappearances in Downtown City." Roger explained. "Can you believe it, Blythie!? A real live alien!"

"Yeah, great." Blythe said dully, her father unaware she already met aliens today.

"It wouldn't kill you to be a little more impressed..." Smokescreen muttered. "Oh, by the way...you wouldn't happen to know anything about those disappearances, would you?"

"No...although..." Blythe put a finger to her chin. "Our math teacher didn't show up for work today, so the school had our mathlete teacher substitute."

"Sounds as a good a lead as any! I'm off!" Smokescreen transformed into his vehicle and blazed out of the L.E.P.S' parking lot before Blythe or Roger could say anything else.

"Look at him go! I don't know a professional race car drive alive who could go that fast." Roger exclaimed.

"We should... probably go after him and try to keep my classmates from panicking at the, you know...giant robot!" Blythe flailed her arms around to emphasize her point.

Roger rubbed his chin and snapped his fingers. "Good point, Blythie. Let's go."

The Baxters, with Russell and Zoe not far behind, ran to get to the school in time to prevent a complete disaster.

Shortly after they left, metal men with cables and plating all over them like twisted astronauts appeared from a street corner, marching towards the Largest Ever Pet Shop with all the clockwork rhythm of a metronome. Silver circles were imprinted on their bellies, and they were torn gaps in their armor to allow for the movement of their stilted joints. The sounds of their marching had something of a synchronized click to them, that magnified its actual volume to make it sound much louder and menacing than it already was.

They rearranged themselves into a single-file line and marched into the Shop, going over to where the Biskits were at, idly observing their nails. The twins were dismissive of the troupe, even though they were larger then them in both size and numbers.

"Who are, like, you, like, weirdos?" Whitney asked.

"We are The Cybermen." One droned, blue lights flashing across it's 'mouth' as it spoke. "We-have-come-for-the-Little-Ponies."

"You mean, like, that thing over there?" Britney pointed over to Apple Bloom, who was making faces in a mirror.

"Yes. Surrender-her-to-us-at-once." The Cybermen droned.

"Britney, should we, like, comply?"

"Like, no. Monban!"

Monban appeared instantly. "Yes?"

"Throw these, like, Cyber...whatever they said, out."

Monban looked at the Cybermen, who looked back.

"We have come for the Ponies." The Cyberman repeated.

Monban and them stared at each other for a conspicuously long time, as if the Cyberman was a long-lost lover daring Monban to return to them after such a long time apart.

Monban reached his extending claw over and picked up Apple Bloom by the scruff of her neck. "Hey! Jus' wut do y'all think yer-WHOA!"

Monban zipped through the store until he located the other two ponies, and he picked them up as well, gathering the Crusaders into a bundle before giving them to the Cybermen.

"Excellent." One droned.

"Your-service-will-be-recorded, Mon-ban." Another buzzed.

"Monban!" Britney and Whitney exclaimed.

"What are you, like, doing?"

"Tch, yeah, you're supposed to, like, obey our voice commands only."

Monban swerved around on his wheel, glaring at his employers with that single, red eye...

"The Cybermen's logic is infallible. Humans are inferior."

"Like...what?" Britney asked.

"Listen, like, Cyberguys, our daddy owns this pet shop, and like, one-third of Downtown, like, City. So if you, like, messed with our robot..."

The Cybermen pointed their arms forwards, a blue light emitting from a strange indentation on them. The light fired out a laser that exploded a nearby product. The twins hugged each other, scared for their lives.

"We will take these fillies now." A Cyberman droned before they turned around and marched their foreboding march out the shop's entrance. Monban followed them, stopping just short of the exit to give his former employers one last despising glare.

* * *

Blythe and her father and pets just barely managed to get to the school in ahead of Smokescreen in time to prevent a panic, since they knew the route to get to the school. All the students out were like a swarm of two-legged piranhas, doing things after school like extra credit or just hanging around the school's spacious ground.

Smokescreen pulled up and transformed, prompting Blythe's friends Jasper and Sue to come over.

"Whoa, Blythe!" Sue exclaimed. "Where did you get such an awesome robot?"

"Yeah!"

"His name is Smokescreen." Blythe told them. She raised her hands to mouth and shouted. "Listen, everyone! I have an alien robot here named Smokescreen who's trying to investigate our math teacher's disappearance!"

Everyone stopped what they were doing to gawk at Smokescreen, before crowding around him and starting to bombard him with questions.

"You're an alien!?"

"What planet are you from?"

"Why are you here?"

"Hey, hey!" Smokescreen objected. "I'll be more then happy to answer your questions later, but right now I need answer, not questions, got it? When the teach disappear?"

"We don't know. He just didn't show up for class today. Hey, how did Blythe get such a cool pet robot?"

Smokescreen's entire head twitched, biting his lip. "ARRRG! I am not Blythe's pet robot! I am Apple Bloom's pet robot! NO! NO!" Smokescreen stomped his foot and swiped his arms through the air. "I am NO ONE'S pet robot!"

The crowd backed away at Smokescreen's outburst. There was a high-pitched scream from another direction, prompting everyone to turn their heads. There was a little girl being pursued by the ominously marching Cybermen.

"Do-not-fear-child. We-will-remove-your-fear." A Cyberman buzzed at her coldly.

"Are those friends of yours?" Blythe asked Smokescreen, pointing to the androids.

"No." Smokescreen stepped forward to confront them. "HEY! Why don't you pick on someone your own size?"

The Cybermen all came to a sudden and abrupt halt, turning their heads upward to gaze at Smokescreen.

"Cybertronian_...recognized._" One bleeped darkly.

"Whoa, whoa!" Smokescreen pointed his finger. "Just what does that mean?"

"Please step aside._ This is a matter of conversion._"

"Our fellow machine should understand the inferiority of the organic tissue worn by the populace here."

"Yeah." Smokescreen rasped. "I do." He primed his pod-like blaster. "Which is why I'm not going to let you hurt them!"

He fired a shot at the foremost Cyberman in the crowd, but he took the hit like a champ and shrugged it off. He turned his weapon on Smokescreen and hit the Autobot square in the shoulder, making him stumble.

"Arrrgh! Under...estimated you guys." Smokescreen growled. He aimed his blasters and let loose everything he had, which proved enough to down the front of line of Cybermen, but as the robots kept marching forward, and Smokescreen kept marching backwards, he realized he needed to change tactics.

"This calls for a little horsepower!" Smokescreen transformed into his vehicle mode and revved himself, trying to build up speed. Once he was good to go, he careened towards the Cybermen, running them over and sending them scattered everything, but they remained intact, and would have no trouble regrouping.

"Scrap." Smokescreen swore at their tenacity. "Everyone, get to safety! I'll draw their attention!"

Smokescreen drove backwards, firing lasers from his headlights to make sure the Cybermen focused on him while he retreated.

"Blythe! I need somewhere retreat while I think of a new plan!"

"Uh, uh, uh..." Blythe stammered. She had never been in this kind of situation before, so she didn't know what to do. "Largest Ever Pet Shop's parking lot?"

"That's actually a pretty good idea!" Smokescreen stopped by the curb in front of them and popped open his door to let the Baxters, Zoe and Russell in. Once they had all climbed in, Smokescreen fired another few rounds at the Cybermen before U-turning and hightailing it out of there faster then they could march.

"_Once we get out of their line-of-sight, I'm going to contact Optimus Prime._"

"Who's Optimus Prime!?"

"_Are you...serious? Oh my gosh, you're serious. I...how far away from Earth's main area do you people live!?_"

"What's Earth's main area?" Russell questioned.

"_..Is that hedgehog trying to talk to me? He's pointing at me and squeaking, so..._"

Blythe rolled her eyes.

* * *

Smokescreen backed into the Largest Ever Pet Shop's parking lot, making sure to obey all proper driving laws- turn signals, stopping for squirrels, and the like. Making his way into an empty parking spot, he took a moment to relax.

"_Okay...we should be safe here for now. I'm gonna call Prime, and he'll come back us up._"

A dial on Smokescreen's dashboard, but all that produced was an incredibly ear-piercing high-pitched whine.

"_Scrap! Must have damaged my comm while fighting the Cyber-guys..._"

"Do you have any other ideas?" Blythe asked.

Smokescreen thought about it for a moment. "Anyone here got a cell phone?"

Both Blythe and Roger pulled out their matching pink cell phones.

"_Excellent. I need you to call this number, so listen very carefully..._"

* * *

Rarity, Miko perched on her back, trotted towards the Apple Orchards to see if Applejack would like to be involved in their hanging out.

"Onward, my gallant steed!" Miko declared, pointing dramatically and enjoying herself.

"Don't push it." Rarity warned.

"Sorry." Just then, Miko's phone rang. "Huh. Blythe Baxter..."

"Friend of yours?"

"Actually, no. I have...no idea who that is."

"Curious...oh! There's Ultra Magnus!" Rarity saw Ultra Magnus hanging out at the Apples' orchard and increased her pace, going from a trot to a gallop to get the Wrecker. Applejack was there, too, enjoying an apple. (What else? An orange?)

"Rarity! Miko!" Ultra Magnus exclaimed at the sight of them. "Ah, how's my favorite two little organics doing? I was just thinking about swinging by Canterlot and picking up Luna and going for a fight, but I guess that can't wait."

"Just fine, Magnus. Just fine."

"Ah-ah-ah!" Ultra Magnus held his hand out. "From now on, all Ponies shall address me as "Your Ultimate Coolness Totally Radical Lord Magnushood Holiness Van Stormm."

Applejack, just barely reigning her contempt and anger, grabbed her hat and stretched it over her face, growling into her Stetson's darkness. "_Y'all have got to be kiddin' me!_"

Rarity stared at Magnus. "...Nnno."

Magnus stared back before shrugging. "Okay. What's up?"

Applejack was irritated at how Rarity how managed get Magnus to drop his ridiculous titles... "_Oh, come on! It's that easy!?_"

Miko listened intently to her cell phone, a garble static like an old cartoon coming out of the other. "Mh-hm. Yeah. No, no, I got it. I'll send help right away." Miko snapped her phone shut.

"Hey, Ultra. Got a call for you."

* * *

"Okay." Blythe closed her phone. "Miko said help is on the way." She undid her seat belt. "I'm going to go find the Crusaders. They should know about this."

"Have fun with your friends!" Roger waved her off. "...Even though there's an impending robot apocalypse."

"Hey!"

"Whaat? Oh. I didn't mean you, Smokescreen." Roger patted Smokescreen's dashboard apologetically. "I meant those other guys."

"Yeah...fun. With the Biskits." Blythe murmured before running into the Largest Ever Pet Shop. She looped around the entire store, but found no sigh of the Crusaders anywhere. Britney and Whitney were still there, though.

"Britney! Whitney! Where are the Cutie Mark Crusaders!?"

The Biskits stared at her, giving a glance at each other.

"Do you know what she's, like, talking about?"

Blythe groaned and smacked her hand against her head. "The talking ponies!"

"Oh. Them. They were, like, these Cyberguys, and they, like..."

"Kidnapped them. Or would that be, like, foalnapped?"

Blythe was surprised. She knew how little Britney and Whitney cared for life besides themselves, but this...this was too much. Hers let out a puff and whistled like a tea kettle. "AND YOU LET THEM!?"

Britney and Whitney flinched. "Like, chill, Blythe. They had, like, weapons pointed at us!"

"Yeah! Plus they, like, totally brainwashed Monban. What we're supposed to, like, do?"

Blythe stood there, shoulders hunched and eyes twitching, before sighing and crossing her arms, realizing her anger would get her nowhere fast. "Fine...I'm not okay with this, but I understand why you did what you did."

Blythe then heard the Cybermen's imperious synchronized march.

Outside, Smokescreen swore. "Scrap! How did they would we'd be here?"

Monban was leading them this time, eying Smokescreen's vehicle mode with his single eye.

Smokescreen opened his door and booted out Roger and the pets before transforming and going to confront Monban. "Who are you, exactly?"

"Monban, security robot. You are a Cybertronian, correct?"

"Correct..." Smokescreen growled, fingers twitching in this Mexican stand-off of theirs.

Blythe, looking from inside, had an idea. "Whitney, Britney, is Monban still connected to the Shop's security cameras?"

Britney and Whitney exchanged looks. "Like...probably."

"That explains how he knew where we were..." Blythe mumbled.

"You should join us." Monban told Smokescreen. "You are a machine, like us. Yet you do the bidding of the inferior human species. Why?"

Smokescreen narrowed his optics. "The first thing Autobot Elite Guards are taught is that it is the duty of the strong to protect those who cannot protect themselves. Now, I'm going to give you one chance to surrender, and come along quietly."

Monban and Smokescreen stared at each other. One, backed by a troupe of robots strong enough to dent even an Autobot. The other, his only companion a dog diva and an OCD hedgehog.

"No." Monban answered.

"Then I'm sorry...but you brought this on yourself."

Smokescreen readied his blaster and fired, burning a hole straight into Monban's chest. Monban jerked about and fell to his side, his red optic blinking out, dead. The Cybermen then fired their weapons, pounding holes into Smokescreen's chest.

"Urrg..." Smokescreen grunted and grimaced, clutching at his wound. With his weapon only barely denting the Cybermen, and their weapons putting holes into him so easily, defeat seemed certain.

...Until a green hole appeared in the sky, and Ultra Magnus and Kup dropped down out of it!

"Halt, villains!" Ultra Magnus shouted at the Cybermen, reaching over his shoulder and pulling out what seemed to be a block of random parts-that quickly rearranged itself into the Magnus Hammer. "For it..._is hammertime!_"

(Kup groaned.)

Ultra Magnus swung his weapon down, touching the Hammer's head to the ground. Electricity flew out from it in bursts, tearing the Cybermen apart-literally. The electric pulse sent pieces of Cybermen flying, covering the parking with arms and legs and helmets for miles.

Satisfied at the carnage, Ultra Magnus swung his hammer over his shoulder and turned around to Smokescreen. "What else you got for me?"

"Well..."

* * *

Inside the L.E.P.S, Blythe was hard at work, thinking of where the Cybermen's base had to be.

"They had Monban on their side...somehow. They came back here when we did. So...they must have their base near here!" Blythe pointed her finger to the sky in her conclusion. "And I think I know just where to find it! Whitney, Britney, do you mind if I have a look around your day camp area?"

"Like, whatever." Britney waved her hand. "It's not like, we could, like, stop you anyway."

"Excellent! Thank you." Blythe ran towards the dark, gloomy, prison-esque section of the shop in the back, her father following close behind.

"What'cha thinking, Blythie?"

"I'm thinking...that the Cybermen probably have their base in here!" Once inside, Blythe started feeling around the room. "Now, think, dad. If I was a robot, where would I hide a secret..."

Blythe's hand brushed over a brick, which beeped and retracted in the wall. With hisses of steam and mechanial whirs, the walls rearranged themselves until a silver metal door with a light bar above it appeared.

"Entrance!"

"All right!" Roger swung his fist. "Good thinking, Blythe! I'm so proud of you."

Blythe blushed. "Heh...thanks, dad. Let's go inside."

They did, and inside they found what was most definitely the Cybermen's base. Pieces of machinery were abound and plentiful, and what could only be described as holding cells were all around the walls.

"Huh." Roger noted. "And just think, they were inside the Largest Ever Pet Shop this whole time!"

"Yeah..." Blythe gasped. "Scootaloo!" She ran towards the wall, where a glass window separated her from Scootaloo, sleeping peacefully on a bed of hay. "Well...at least she's comfortable." Looking around, Blythe saw Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle in identical set-ups.

"Hey, Blythe!" Roger pointed. "Isn't that your math teacher who disappeared?"

Blythe turned around, and yes, it was. Her math teacher was on some sort of operating slab, pieces of machinery pointed at him in a most unsettling way.

"Hey, guys. Blythe." The hippie teacher nodded at his student. "I don't mean to be a buzz kill, but could you, like, get me out of here?"

"We'll try." Blythe went to what she presumed was the control panel. Taking a stab in the dark, she pushed a button, hoping it would free her teacher from his bonds.

"_CONVERSION...ACTIVATED._" A voice like an amplified Cyberman's echoed around.

"Conversion!?" Roger started to panic. Not a good time to lose his head, of all times. "Well, what does that mean!?"

The pieces of machinery sprung to life, reaching into dark crevasses and secret panels to pull out what seemed to be a Cybermen's armor, with leggings, gauntlets and their helmet split into two sides.

The math teacher looked at the slowly forming outfit, which was encroaching on him, intending to dress him in it. "I don't mean to be rude, but, could you, like...HELP!"

"Ah...da...ah!" Blythe stammered, not knowing what to do.

"What do we do, Blythe!?"

"I don't know! Just...break something!"

"I'm on it!" Roger went up to the control panel, gently shoving his daughter out of the way, and examined it, trying to best calculate his attack.  
"Huuua...wah!" With an (over dramatic) shout, Roger raises his leg and kicked the control panel, causing it to buzz, crackle and spark in protest as its wires were kicked out of their appropriate places.

All the machinery stopped whirring and moving, and the restrains on the math teacher came off. Dropping off the slab, the teacher breathed a sigh of relief.

"Whew! Thanks. I owe you big time, dude."

"No problem." Roger said, putting a hand on the teacher's shoulder. "Anything for one of Blythe's school instructors."

Blythe chuckled nervously. "Heheh...Dad, you're embarrassing me."

"Halt!"

The three of them were alarmed to see another troupe of Cybermen, marching their imperial march straight towards them.

"Stay where you are. You will be assimilated. We will remove your emotions and allow you to think logically. Do not resist."

"Get outside!" Blythe shouted. "We'll have a better chance of fighting them there!"

The three of them ran for it, running out of the secret area and heading straight outside into the parking lot, where they were all surprised to see more Autobots.

"Uh, before you ask, Blythe..." Smokescreen answered pre-emptively. "Yes, these ones ARE friends of mine."

The Biskits' twins ran screaming out of the shop, the Cybermens' march right behind them.

"More of these guys?" Ultra Magnus raised an eyebrow.

"Allow me, sir." Kup offered. He aimed his bazooka at them, taking them all out with one explosive shot like an master huntsman shooting ducks in a barrel...except for the explosive part.

"Hopefully, that's the last of them." Blythe said, hiding behind Magnus' leg. "Come on." She gestured at her father and the teacher. "We've got to get those fillies out of those cells."

Making their way back into the Cybermens' secret hideout, they picked up some things from the shop and used them to break the glass. The sound of the shattering windows woke up them all up.

"What happened?" Scootaloo wondered out loud.

"We got captured by those...Cyber-thingies and fell asleep in here." Sweetie Belle answered, being helped by Roger out of her cell window. Once she was out, she looked at the end of the hallway. "Hey, what's that over there? Looks Cybertronian..."

While Blythe struggled to figure out how to open the rest of the holding cells and free the prisoners inside, who were no doubt going to be converted into Cybermen, Sweetie Belle went to the end of the hallway and dragged out the two items she found. Blythe lucked her way into the finding just the right button for release just as Sweetie Belle got outside the Pet Shop and presented her findings to Ultra Magnus and Smokescreen.

"What do you have there, Sweetie Belle?"

"I don't know!"

"Here, let me see..." Ultra Magnus knelt down and took the items. The first was a Cybertronian audio log, which looked like a cassette with glowing runic lines. The second was a bizarre badge that seemed modeled after the Autobot insignia, but it was black, and the face wore a visor and had a faceplate. In addition to that, when Ultra Magnus turned it upside right, he felt like he actually turned it upside down, and its upside down WAS its upside right.

Ultra Magnus held the audio log up curiously. "Optimus will probably want to see this..."

"So, you're aliens?" The math teacher questioned, derailing Magnus' train of thought.

"Yes, we are."

"How long have you been on Earth?"

"Oh, we've actually been here awhile. It's that your local news apparently stinks at reporting what's going on a more world-wide scale."

"Huh." Roger exhaled. "And to think, they were aliens here this whole time! And we didn't hear a word of it..."

"Yeah...so, anyways..."

* * *

_Hours later, at Omega-One..._

Much, much later in the evening, after Blythe and her friends had been brought to visit Team Prime at their base (which involved Blythe fainting at the sight of Optimus) Optimus carried the audio log Sweetie Belle had retrieved.

He placed it on the terminal and activated it. A recorded voice began playing out, informing him of what had been said during the time the log was active...

"_Remember, Cybermen. I choose you for this because you were the best in your home solar system. Do not fail me, especially not now, after I've come so close. Do what you will, do what you like. Convert the population of Downtown City, for all I care. Go out and have a drink. But whatever you do...make sure Optimus Prime has his attention elsewhere!_"

Optimus put his hand to his mouth and 'hmm'ed at the log's mysterious contents, which...did not bode well.

Particularly considering he had an encounter with Daleks today while on Equestria with Princess Celestia.

* * *

And in the dark, as the ponies of Equestria all laid in bed under a starry night sky, content and at peace in the knowledge they had Celestia, Luna, and Cadence watching over them and their families...

The mysterious, upside-down modified Autobot logo on the badge that had been found...

Pulsated in purple lighting across Apple Bloom's, Scootaloo's, and Sweetie Belle's chests.

* * *

**Author's Notes for "Up In Smoke"**

**This _totally_ isn't leading up to something, _no!_**

**Originally, the title had a little more meaning, as Smokescreen would've stubbornly refused to call Optimus Prime for back-up, even though he was clearly out-matched, thus making the mission go...'up in smoke'. Also it would've been Sweetie Belle's idea to call Miko using Blythe's phone with the _explicit goal_ of calling Ultra Magnus to loophole around Smokescreen's insistence on not calling Optimus.  
**

**So, Ultra Magnus has been confirmed for the show.**

**Now, let's sort this out: For the purpose of FIM:P, Ultra Magnus will remain in his PRID body, with the personality I came up with for him.**

**...Aaannd the FF website did a revamp. It's too early for me to pass judgement, but it's a little jarring to not see blue everywhere.**


End file.
